This is my second day as a non-smoker.
I won't lie--It sucks.
I like smoking. I enjoy pulling the hot smoke into my lungs, gently taping the cigarette to keep the ashes from falling...ahhh, memories. My brain is split in two. There's a big part of me that says, "yeah, I know smoking is bad for me, but who cares? I will die eventually one way or another. Is lung cancer really that bad."
Yes, lung cancer is that bad. I watched my grandmother wither away to nothing in a hospital bed while cancerous cells devoured her lung tissue and eventually took her life.
I have been lying about my new-found smoking habit to my family and co-workers. I had to either come clean about smoking or give it up. I chose to give it up. I'm angry and annoyed. I just want a cookie, no, make that lots of cookies. I'm irritated. I can't keep my thoughts straight, much less write a coherent blog post.